Hellboy

In some aspects, Hellboy has pretty decent balls. Unfortunately, not even the exploited to the marrow R-rating and the good jokes here and there can alter the fact that it looks uglier than shit. Really, it’s been a long time since I last saw an audiovisual work that looked so terribly unaesthetic. An awful, overelaborated digital mess; the cancer of modern filmmaking and, in this case, in the terminal stage. (2019-04-11)

Harbour’s good, with all the right catchphrases. The gigantic outcasts from hell in the climax might be the most impressive ever. The casting of Milla Jovovich appropriately defines the target audience composed of fans of bloody, B-level monster freak-shows. Neil Marshall’s imagination knows no bounds, nor does his courage (or lack of common sense?) to flush such a huge budget down the drain. His Hellboy amuses with its stupidity, excess and craziness, but watching it in a cinema seemed extremely out of place, even bizarre. With the right crew at home, beer and popcorn, I might be inclined to give it three stars. (2019-04-17)

Guillermo del Toro's Hellboy was more fairytale-like (but still pretty creepy), both films had amazing production design, make-up effects and a distinctive creative imagination. Neil Marshall's vision relies heavily on gory visuals, is more brash and doesn't shy from swear words, in short, it's an R-rated film with all the trimmings, which in the end has its pros and cons. I was unfortunately not as amused by David Harbour's banter as I was by Ron Perlman’s, in fact I had somewhat of a problem sympathising with any of the characters as they all more or less got on my nerves. Besides, the connection with the Arthurian legend left me with rather mixed impressions. But not to cast aspersions, of the characters, I was most interested (i.e. least irritated) by the witch Nimue and liked the excursion to Baba Yaga's cottage on chicken legs. I'm sorry to see how the latest Hellboy movie turned out, because the potential here was great. I wanted to criticise the film for its mostly distracting visuals and not-so-nice visual effects, but given the $50 million budget, that's understandable. But still, what a shame! (2019-04-22)

Having a 50 million-dollar full-length feature written by a debutant screenwriter with no experience in feature-lenght films, and assuming that it will then "somehow" work under the direction of a slasher B-movie director from England, is a really ignorant overestimation. It is therefore fair for the producers that the movie flopped. Although it seems there must have been a serious endeavor to please the comic book’s fans, Cosby's screenplay for this two-hour-long movie just does not work at all, and it appears to be an overpriced and incoherent dud, where the shallow characters have no chemistry between them, and so we cannot feel any sort of emotions from them. Also, their motivations are either completely shallow or straight up just completely random. Hellboy comes across like a computer game, where you are constantly jumping from one location to another, finding a key that will move you on to the next level, in a superficial (and seemingly unnecessary) plot. With all that being said, this movie is a really disgustingly big pile of CGI excrement. However, when I put aside even the most basic expectations I have from any movie (in other words, I switch off my brain), I absolutely did not enjoy this in any way. Actually, after those two hours, I could not figure out how this appalling failure of a movie was supposed to hold my attention. (2019-09-17)

The new Hellboy flopped at the box office and with critics, and I'm not too happy either. Neil Marshall may have made the solid The Descent and the perfect post-apocalyptic B-movie Doomsday, but Hellboy won't rank among the highlights of his career. There's no story, which is to be expected, but the weird nonsensical jumping from scene to scene felt annoying to the point of artificiality. David Harbour isn't downright bad, but the humour is so dry that I didn't laugh once, which I take as a huge minus. When it comes to the action, it's pretty good to watch, it's very substantial in terms of gore – I can't remember the last time I saw such carnage in the cinema – but it's a great shame things usually end up when they are at their best. Praise should be given to the scene with the giants (which could have been longer), Baba Yaga who had eerily perfect make up, and the finale, which is again too short and doesn't live up to its full potential. It's a shame that outside of the action, the film is rather boring and has nothing to surprise and impress. Thanks to the decent serving of gore and a fair amount of monsters of all kinds, the film is watchable, but I was expecting a more entertaining ride. 60% (2019-04-14)